Huh? Sleeping with my dog is dangerous?

Yeap, the media found a way to scare you, once again.

According to a HealthDay article,

You might want to think twice before snuggling in bed at night with Fido or Fluffy.

According to a report published in the February issue of the public health journal Emerging Infectious Diseases, seemingly healthy pets can carry parasites, bacteria or viruses that cause mild to life-threatening illness in people.

In one case a 69-year-old man, whose dog slept under the covers with him and licked his hip replacement wound, came down with meningitis. Another incident involved a 9-year-old boy who got plague, a potentially deadly bacterial infection, from sleeping with his flea-infested cat.

Let me guess. He was using probably a bandage that looks like this around his wound:

We, dog owners, shoudln’t sleep with our dogs because they may be dangerous?

Here’s how we respond do that:

What? Not sleep with our beloved four legged best friends? Are you INSANE?

What about all the known health benefits of owning a pet?

If you’re going to get scared about sleeping with your dog or cat for 0.0000000001% chance of getting any kind of disease whatsoever, here are some other animals that you should be worried about.

1) Orangutangs with attitude – These animals will flip you off in traffic. Even if THEY cut YOU off.

Danger level: None, unless you REALLY piss off this overgrown 300lb. monkey.
People affected: Not too many.

2) Pigeons that can read – thanks Barnes & Nobles bookstores, every pigeon on earth will simultanously poop on a human being on their way to work.

Danger level: Low
People affected: Anyone standing or walking outside.

3) Over-friendly Pigs – where do you think swine flu came from?

Danger level: Mild
People affected: Over-friendly, over-curious kids who love to kiss farm animals on the mouth

4) Deers hunting – Not deer hunting. Deers hunting.

Danger level: High
People affected: Stupid deer hunters.

5) Squirrels with Bazookas – Military surplus from the war in Iraq fell in the hands of these furry evil rats into backyard commandos. Make sure to buy lots of insurance for your house.

Danger level: High
People affected: People near trees. Dogs that chase squirrels.

6) Hungry Horses – They’ll eat anything they can fit in their mouth.

Danger level: Fatal. Avoid at all cost.
People affected: Little kids.

7) Sniper Bunnies – They’re friends with deer, apparently.

Danger level: High
People affected: Same stupid hunters.

8 ) Darth Vedar Cows – This is the mother of all dangerous animals.

Danger level: Super high. They don’t call this cow’s ride “Death Star” because it’s pretty in pink.
People affected: Total & complete annihilation of earth.

Let’s all pray and hope this cow doesn’t find out about steakhouses.. or that there really aren’t any quarters in the McDonald’s quarter-pounders.


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Showing 3 comments
  • Kim

    The picture of the girl kissing the pig is my daughter, and I really don’t appreciate you using the picture and calling her a bastard, and no she did not get the Swine flu!

  • Charlotte Kraus

    I really enjoy receiving the Pawspal newsletter and updates!! really good stuff!!! Thanx Charlotte

  • Roberta Fehr

    I am a diabetic and my little shih tzu wakes me up in the middle of the night if my sugar levels gets low and with my depression. So there are more advantages to having your pet near you as often as necessary. I think I would rather take my chances with my pet then any other human being who could also past something on to me.

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